Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Hello???? I hear you and it is still November.

For some reason, I seem to be convinced that this week is not the end of November but the first week of December. I don't know why but I have to keep reminding myself that there is still a few days left before the first full week of December.

DC had a doctor's appointment yesterday and I was SURE he had a dental appointment today, even though I was already reminded once (okay.... twice. OKAY! 3 Times) that the appointment is NEXT Tuesday, I just could not get it out of my head that this/today was not December 5th.

(One might think that having Mr. Calendar in the house might keep me on the right path as to what day it is, but Nooooo -  for some reason he just took my word for it)

I made all of the arrangements one makes when one's child has an appointment:

  • *I cancelled his after work yoga class .
  • *I notified his transportation that he would not be staying for yoga and he would need a ride home.
  • *I wrote in his talk book so that the people at his program would know that he was not staying for  yoga and would have to come home via his regular transportation.
  • *I explained to DC that he would have to get right into his aide's car when he got home to get to the  dentist on time. I would come from work and meet him there.
  • *I listened to him talking about the dentist and pointing to his teeth over and over again (and over and over again)
  • *I texted his aide to remind him that there was no yoga and about the appointment.


So now I had to admit to being a human train wreck (which probably did not come as much of a surprise to anyone) and undo everything I just did.

After being wound up since Sunday about his dental appointment, I now had to try to unwind him. One might imagine that because he was so wound up about the dentist that he would be happy or relieved that it was cancelled. Oddly, this is not always the case. Sometimes he just gets more wound up. I believe it is because he has put so much time into obsessing about the thing he does not want to do- it actually makes him angrier when we just cannot just get it over with. I was hoping that this would not be one of those times.

I decided to Face Time him.

Using the telephone has been a work in progress for many years**.
I do try to use Face Time every once in a while so he is familiar with it.  If something were to happen or he should get lost, he might be able to show me what he is may not be able to communicate.

In this case, I wanted to be able to see him and know that he was paying attention to what I was saying. I had to try twice to get him to pick up the call.

When he did finally answer, all I saw was

his ear... (we definitely need to work on this a little bit more)

I got him to look at me and made sure he was paying attention.
I started out with:

"Mom made a mistake." (Because he LOVES that!).

Fortunately Mom making a mistake combined with not missing yoga over-rode his anxiety about the appointment being cancelled.


**More about the phone:

Don’t Forget to Call Mom - April 2014

Hey! That’s not in the script! - June 2015

Special Delivery and throwing a wrench in the routine - August 2016

The Phone and the Routine - June 2017


This blog is used for shorter posts also for longer Facebook statuses. Please visit my official blog site at: Taking it a Step at a Time

Sunday, November 12, 2017

'Hair-dish-on" is GONE!

For those who might be new here... DC hates the air conditioner ('Hair-dish-on' in DC-speak). He has never been a fan but this summer it seemed to be bothering him a little bit more. Let me also say that I, living in "Hot Flash Hell" was not ready to let it go.

Just.  Could. Not. Do. It.

(You can read the previous post on the subject here: Is it Hot in Here or Is It Just Me?

The Battle Told via Facebook Statuses

Moving out of August and into September:
So the battle of the "Hair-dish-on" (air conditioner) rages on....

DC figured out how to turn it off (it isn't hard, I just never realized that he was paying attention). As soon as he decides he is going to bed he shuts the air conditioner off in the living room... He's not going to be in the living room; he's not going to be on the same floor - but apparently it needs to be off. END.OF.DAY... for him.
It makes no difference that I am still going to be downstairs ..... I think he thinks he's making headway... a little bit at a time. 
So far, he has not attempted to turn off the one in my room...

Facebook Status 9/27/17

And.... into October

DC: Mom, this is the kitchen.
This is the living room. 
(Pointing at the ceiling) DC's room (pointing again) Mom's room. 
Me: (wondering what this is all about) Yes. 
DC: October - almost Halloween. 
Me: Yes.
DC: take 'Hair-dish-on' out.
(Air conditioner )
Me: Not yet but we're getting there - maybe November.
(Apparently he was trying to distract me from his asking about the air conditioner again - just threw it in amongst all of the other info he was spouting.)
Now he's off to change the calendars....
Happy #calendarflipday

Facebook Status 10/1/17


He's searching for any little gleam of hope

(This morning) Me: DC please get a jacket. It’s a little chilly this morning. It will probably get warmer later so don’t forget to bring it home.
DC: Mom will put the ‘Hair-dish-on’ away. (Air Conditioner)
(It is not even on. Now it’s just the fact that it is there)
#NotYet #SeeingTheLightAtTheEndOfTheTunnel #IsItHotInHereOrIsItJustMe

Facebook Status 10/2/17


For the last 3 or 4 mornings I had to force DC to wear a jacket. It's been a little chilly in the mornings (I did not need a jacket, myself - in case anyone was wondering #IsItHotInHereOrIsItJustMe ).
Summer seems to have returned so I did not tell him to wear his jacket this morning. The van pulled out of the driveway and I watched it turn back around to come back (Oh boy! What is wrong? It's not even Monday) - The driver opened his window and says, "He wants his hoodie". In the hopes of keeping the morning moving along I told him to tell DC that it is warm out and he didn't need it.
I could see him talking into the back seat, but he turned back to the window and yelled: "Nope, he's getting out"
DC came charging up the sidewalk to get the hoodie that I had to force him to wear all week. I told him that he didn't need it. He wasn't hearing any of it.
He was determined to wear this jacket, no matter what. There is no flip-flopping between seasons or changing of the weather.
#SummerIsOver 'Hair-dish-on' OUT! (a little bit of wishful thinking on his part)

Facebook Status 10/5/17


Mom! Halloween is coming! 'Fanksgiving' is coming! Next Christmas is coming! 
'Hair-dish-on' AWAY in November!

I think I might understand his complete preoccupation with the air conditioner this year. 

He never liked it but he put up with it. Getting rid of it was never this urgent.

Two things come to mind.

1. I have left them in much longer the last few years (for reasons discussed at the beginning)

2. Last year, we went away for Columbus Day Weekend. Before we left, we took the A/C's out because we were getting new windows. He thought he was home free. Within a week, I had to put them back in again. I think that just ruined it forever for him.

October 6, 2017

It's November - DC just announced that the 'hair-dish-on' should be out. I had previously told him that it would be sometime in November, so I guess to him that means RIGHT NOW! 

Facebook Status 11/2/17


The Light at the end of the tunnel

At least he gave me a day before he began harping about November and the Air Conditioner.
It was getting cooler out and I did (gasp) have to turn on the heat a little bit, once. 
Unfortunately for DC, it got warm again. I told him just one more week, to be safe.

He hasn't written it on the calendar yet, so technically next week is not engraved in stone, but I believe "technically" will not matter in this case. I really hope we don't have some kind of freak heatwave or something because they really have to come out now that I gave a specific time frame.

I have my fingers crossed...

Gone!!! Gone!! Gone!!!

November 8, 2017

He opted for helping to take the air conditioner out over a trip to the library!

As it turned out.... there was time for both...........

This blog is used for shorter posts and also for longer Facebook statuses. Please visit my official blog site at: Taking it a Step at a Time

Monday, November 6, 2017

Library, Yoga and a Change in the Routine

I have always tried NOT to make everything in DC's life a routine. Obviously things like school and work have to be routine, but I do really try not to have a routine for everything. As it has been only he and I for most of his life, not having a lot of set routines was/is easy. I did not have to work around or worry about other people, just us.
It has helped him be a little bit more flexible when things don't go as planned, get cancelled or just change. This is not to say that he does not make up his own routines in his head and that he does not get upset when things change, but he does not get AS upset as he once did.
When we had to move one of his two library days due to a yoga class that he started taking, it wasn't a big deal.
It always seems to be the little things that throw him.....


On Tuesdays, DC stays after work for yoga. Tuesday is also library and grocery shopping day (some of the life skills that he and his staff work on). His staff picks him up at yoga. 
Before yoga started, he would take his transport home first to get his list and library books but since yoga started, it is easier to go directly to the store without coming home. DC being upset one day when his other aide had to bring him to an appointment without stopping home because he did not have a CD for the trip, now remembers to pack a CD in the morning before he leaves for work on yoga day. 

Library has been moved to Wednesdays for yoga season because although he will pack a CD, he did not want to pack all of his books ahead of time - they must be moved to the kitchen chair in the morning before he leaves, not go into his backpack.... period. This morning he also thought ahead and packed his shopping list so they would not have to stop home after work!!!!!!
He remembers the CD because it is for him. He moves his books to the chair because that is all about him. When we go on vacation, he does not think ahead about what clothes to bring but he remembers every bit of technology, DVD's and everything that goes with it. This is the first time he has actually planned ahead for something that doesn't directly relate directly to him!

After a morning of battling over clothes, DC went off script and apologized "for the pants" when he called me from the car after work. I was leery of the same battle starting again the following morning but he seemed fine until it was time to go out to the car.

Running and repeating "I 'gotta' hurry", when he doesn't, usually means he's getting agitated. 
I waited at the door for him to get to the car and run back, which is what he does when he can't get a grip in the morning.

He didn't. He got in the car and closed the door!


The car started pulling away - stopped - and pulled back into the driveway.
Driver: (opening his window) "He wants a hug"
Me: "??????" (thinking maybe he realized he hadn't hugged me when he left; I went to the car)
DC Jumped out and said "Lie-ber-ary Books!" (con-artist)
<Friday is Library day at different library than the Tuesday Library day >
Me: "Ohhhhh, so you didn't really want a hug!"
He hugged me to make it look good while asking for the Library books....

He does not want to take the books with him on Tuesdays so I could not understand why he so wanted to take the books with him on a Friday.
I explained that he did not need to take the books with him because he would be coming home before he went to the library that afternoon.
That wasn't good enough so DC (and me in my pajamas, Yay!) stood on the sidewalk spreading autism awareness once again to the neighborhood.
This was going on and on so finally, I told him to just to and get them. It was clear that we would be out there all morning, otherwise.

He ran into the house and came out without any books!

He yelled, "I'm sorry" from the door and ran back towards me and the car!!!!???

I assumed that once he got into the house and calmed down, he realized that he really did not need to bring them....
He was fine and they drove away. When I got back inside I realized that he did not want to take the books at all. He had forgotten to move them from "Library Book Pile" to "Library Book Chair" before he left....

More about the Library - Going to the Lie-ber-ary

This blog is used for shorter posts and also for longer Facebook statuses. Please visit my official blog site at: Taking it a Step at a Time